Should she believe him? (Excerpt from novel-in-progress)

"Mom, what took you so long?"

"Just adult talk, sweetie." Surely Nicholas wouldn't notice the flush in her face. Her cheek, her ear, her neck all felt like they were on fire.

Aaron had always affected her this way - physically, sexually. But what of his comment about love? She was wise enough now to know that allowing herself to love him again would be a bad move. He did not know how to make the kind of commitment she would seek from a man.

But how to deny the desire - the tingling from her head to her toes - that she felt when Aaron touched her? She'd had a few dates about a year after Todd passed, but she hadn't been intimate with a man in a long time. Could they...?

Not a good idea, she told herself sternly. They had confused lust with love once before, and it had cost her dearly.

Damn, but I do miss it..

Mother's Day Idea - and a Free Sneak Peek!

How about a personalized, signed copy of Last Chance Rescue?

Introduce someone you care about to Jessie, an Iraq war veteran, and Brad, a laid-off advertising executive who finds himself on Jessie's search-and-rescue team.

Bring her alongside Jessie and Brad as they face not just physical obstacles, but their own internal struggles. Will they finally let down the walls and rescue each other?

NOT LIMITED TO MOTHERS!

A personalized, signed book is a great way to say "thank you" or "thinking about you" to anyone in your life (even a GUY, they like this book too!).

GET A 'SNEAK PEEK'

If you order by May 9th, I'll include a copy of the first four chapters of my forthcoming novel, True Surrender.

True Surrender is the story of a die-hard military officer whose experience at the hands of terrorists -- and the resultant amputation of one of his legs -- is just the beginning of his personal transformation. What happens when he is forced to choose between love and duty?

So order now (no special code needed). If you have a special message you want included, put it in the notes. If you'd like it mailed directly to your recipient, just let me know. I'll do the rest. But hurry - Mother's Day is coming up fast!

STILL Working on Synopsis

I sent draft #7 of the synopsis for Novel #2 to a fellow writer/reviewer a few weeks ago. It took a couple weeks (first it was his schedule, then it was mine), but while I was on vacation (skiing in Montana!) last week, we connected via phone and hashed over it for nearly two hours. (Two hours! Over three pages!)

It still amazes me that every time I think something is "close" (in this case, I thought maybe 2-3 more drafts) ... I've so much more to do than I thought. It's bad but it's good - after all, it only gets better each time I re-work it.

Or perhaps I'm too much of a perfectionist with this synopsis. Maybe I'm putting too much pressure on it. Its sole purpose is for the agent query letter... So what if I can't get an agent to consider the novel? I've self-published once; I can certainly do it again.

But there's just something in me that compels me: if I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it RIGHT. I want to do it to the best of my ability. (And it's not just writing that I feel that way about.)

I will say this: writing the synopsis is HARDER than (and certainly not as fun as) writing the book! And until I finish it, I'm stuck in one spot. I can't work on the novel because I need 'distance' from it while writing the synopsis. And, of course, I can't send out agent queries without a synopsis. And - as always - time is an issue. So I'm going to sign off now and work on it some before my daughter wakes from her nap...

Another Essay to be Published - More Motorcycling!

An essay I wrote about what I learned from riding a motorcycle is going to be published in an anthology titled Press Pause Moments: Essays About Life Transitions by Women Writers.

It's great to at least be writing and talking about motorcycling, since it's still too cold to actually DO it...

Editor Anne reports that she is hoping for publication in May (Mother's Day). I will let you know as soon as I find out!

Iraq War Marine Military Memoir: How it Helps my Writing

I picked up Joker One by Donovan Campbell after reading his article in Guideposts magazine. I wanted to see how his faith fared while he was immersed in the military/combat life. In the book, the faith/Christian themes are pretty low-key; however, the insightful observations Campbell draws about the human spirit and LOVE in particular were – at least for me – a clear expression of his spirituality.

This is the most balanced war memoir I've read. It's not about politics and it's not dripping with military ego/pride. Campbell's ability to be straightforward and honest about his own shortcomings, regrets and emotional state is truly compelling. It's about his personal journey and how he is changed by what he experiences – and he's not afraid to tell it like it is. He's obviously driven, and he's hard on himself.

In fact, I found parallel characteristics between Campbell and Major Aaron Bricewick, the fictional 'star' of True Surrender, my novel-in-progress! So there was an extra element of discovery in reading this ... any doubts I had about whether my character was acting realistically were settled!

Besides that, Campbell's either got a natural knack for writing or an incredible editor, because this book pulls everything together in a way that other Iraq memoirs I've read haven't. And - let's face it - 'technically' good writing makes for an easier read, allowing the book concept to really come to life. Nothing gets in the way of Campbell's sometimes powerful realizations ... which is just what I've been working on in True Surrender!

Reflections on a Second Anniversary

It has been two years this month since Last Chance Rescue was released. I can't believe it's been that long!

So I'm feeling somewhat reflective about that ... and a little disappointed. In my naivette, I had hoped Last Chance Rescue would have a greater reach. I didn't know then (and I only know a little more now) how difficult it would be to market a book on my own.

I had also hoped to have my next novel, titled "True Surrender," completed by now, with letters sent off to agents in the hope that I can find a publisher (so that the book might 'live larger' than Last Chance has).

But there are the realities of life. This past year has been difficult for many businesses, and Leader Motorcycle (which I own and operate) has been no different. It has required my all (and then some). Luckily I love what I do. But the "writing life" was put on hold for a good portion of 2009.

I also have no desire to miss out on time with my children (7 and 2-1/2). Nathan's art was one of only TWO chosen from his entire school to be displayed at the State Capitol (St. Paul, MN) for the month of March ("Young Artists Month"). And Evelyn is showing a true gift for singing (just like her mom, some might say!). I've kept up on my taiko studies, but the flight lessons were put on hold in November (and have yet to resume).

Together my husband and I have also undertaken a new service: training to be Marriage Mentors through our church. We feel a true calling to this, as we've been through a marital crisis ourselves and we see so many marriages hurting these days.

Many of you have asked how I do so many things and pursue so many interests. The answer has increasingly been, "I don’t ... not really ...not now." I'm just like most of you: the majority of my time is spent working or caring for my children.

So where does that leave writing? A distant fifth or sixth, from what I've written above. But my life is full and I feel blessed. I will continue to write when I can. "True Surrender" will get finished (and it will be worth the wait!). So thanks for the support you've shown, and for sharing Last Chance Rescue with anyone you can think of.

Defining Moment as a Writer - Part II (see November for Part I)

There were two.

The first: holding the "draft copy" of Last Chance Rescue. I was in awe. I caressed the cover; I kept opening the front flap to look at my name inside. The hundreds of hours, the agonizing over edits, and the painstaking care I'd taken in the details of the book and its presentation (cover, layout, etc.) were suddenly all worth it. (Never mind that no one had seen it yet!)

The second: being named as a Finalist in the 2009 Indie Awards. I had struggled with getting the word out about Last Chance Rescue - the requisite "self promotion" doesn't come naturally. But here was someone else (not just me) saying the book was good! It was validation in its truest sense, and came at a pivotal time.

And now...I can't wait to do it again! (Novel #2 is about a military officer's harrowing experience at the hand of terrorists, and his personal journey to learn what is truly worth fighting for, and what True Surrender means.)

And that, more than anything else, may just be the true mark of an author. Because writing is hard work - and it doesn't pay the bills for many of us. I do it because there are stories that refuse NOT to be told. There are times I think to myself, 'why in the world would I want to do that again?' and yet...I can't resist.

So perhaps there's a third defining moment that is ongoing!